Callisto
Parody of "Calypso"  by John Denver, parody lyrics by Linda Swann

Now here is a tale, yes a tale of two ladies,
Tho dif’rent upbringing ‘twas sorrow they found.
The first was a princess belov’d by the god king
Who wooed her and chased her and gave her a son.
As mother and child they lived very happ’ly
That is until jealousy lifted her head.

Woe Callisto, Zeus sang of your beauty 
Till Hera found out and she turned you to bear.
Woe Callisto, you wander the heavens
Tho never to rest in the ocean down there.

(Yodeling interlude)

The next was a war’ior who battled with Xena
A leather clad vixen hell bent on revenge.
She raided each village, destroyed ev’ry town
Res’rected by Hera as half-deity.
She killed Gabby’s husband and fought with Velasca,
Killing her just for ambrosia to seize.

Woe Callisto, so bold and so brazen
Through death and destruction you played out your part.
Woe Callisto, your last wish was granted
When the Hind’s blood was planted so deep in your heart.

Woe Callisto, so wild in your beauty 
The godhood you stole brought you down just the same.
Woe Callisto, the winsome young princess
Belov-ed of Zeus, and yet cursed was your name.

(More yodeling, I think)